WOODCHIPPER MASSACRE

WOODCHIPPER MASSACRE

When their dad goes away for the weekend on a business trip, siblings Jon (Jon McBride), Denise (Denice Edeal) and Tom (Tom Casiello) are left holding the fort. Their dad has arranged for grouchy Aunt Tess (Patricia McBride) to babysit them in his absence.

The one job that Jon has been given by his father is to make good use of the huge wood-chipping machine he's hired for the weekend. And by good use, that means clear their huge garden of all stray branches and grind them down into chips.

However, after enduring barked orders and horrible food from Tess on the first day, things get even worse for the kids when Tom receives a mail-order knife in the post. The Aunt tries to confiscate it from him, and in an ensuing struggle he inadvertently stabs her in the stomach - killing her. The kids fret about what they should do, if the police should be notified, and so on. But Jon eventually decides the best course of action would be to hack her body into pieces, feed it through the chipper then tell Dad she had to leave in a hurry.

The kids do the dirty deed without much qualms, and everything seems to work out fine ... until Tess' derailed jailbird son Kim (Kim Bailey) turns up looking to blag some cash from his mother.

Kim is a dangerously desperate man who won't take no for an answer. After much shouting and bickering, it seems the kids can only think of one way to rid themselves of the unwelcome visitor ...

Intended as a dark sitcom, director Jon McBride's follow-up to CANNIBAL CAMPOUT is a much tamer affair. Despite the suggestive title, there is virtually no gore on display here. Nor is there much action of any description. Rather, it's a tepid run through the tired premise of bickering kids with a house to themselves for the weekend. Everyone shouts a lot - much akin to the characters in early John Waters movies - but the dialogue is insipid and forgettable. Oh, and for a sitcom, there are no jokes.

With an annoying score, unlikeable characters, an aimless plot and no gore set-pieces to at least break the monotony, WOODCHIPPER MASSACRE is impossible to recommend.

The disc, however, is a good one. The film is presented uncut in it's original 1.33:1 aspect ratio and looks reasonably good - bright, colourful and sharp - despite the occasional vertical line due to the age of the video source material.

The mono audio is loud, clear and consistent. Unfortunately so is the hiss that is prevalent throughout.

Extras include a 13-minute "Making Of" which is actually new interviews with cast members, and is fairly engaging.

An archive 13-minute interview with cable TV presenter Video Bob follows, as part of his "Stupid Movie Of The Week" slot. Well-humoured fluff.

4 minutes of stills from the shoot of the film show that it was a light-natured time on location.

The best extra is an informative and easy-going commentary track from McBride, speaking down a telephone line to filmmaker Mark Polonia. McBride discusses the distributor's disappointment at the lack of gore in the final cut, and reveals how he'd like to someday remake WOODCHIPPER MASSACRE as a musical. Heaven help us all.

The disc is completed by trailers from MASSACRE, CANNIBAL CAMPOUT, GHOUL SCHOOL (which looks quite good!), and VIDEO VIOLENCE PARTS 1 and 2.

Finally, there's also an inlay card with liner notes from McBride.

Painfully padded out with scenes of, well, nothing, WOODCHIPPER MASSACRE is not an enjoyable experience. If you thought CANNIBAL CAMPOUT was bad, you'll hate this - I assure you.

Review by Stu Willis


 
Released by Camp Motion Pictures
Region 1 NTSC
Not Rated
Extras : see main review
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