VAMPIRE JUNCTION

One of prolific Spanish director Jesus Franco's most recent excursions into sexy lesbian vampire territory ...

College journalist Dr Mados (Lina Romay) travels to the near-deserted town of Fallas in New Mexico, in the vain hope of snagging an interview with the elusive surgeon, Dr Spencer.

Upon her arrival (an atmospheric drive through torrential rain - quite effective, admittedly), Mados finds she is unable to pin down Spencer and reluctantly agrees to rent a room in the town's only functioning hotel: Hotel Flamingo.

Before long, however, we find Mados writhing uncomfortably on her hotel room bed, unable to sleep due to vivid nightmares concerning a flame-haired vampire Countess (Fata Morgana) and her highly erotic seduction of a mohawked Samantha Olsen.

The blood-draining seduction of Olsen is indeed a lengthy and very explicit proposition - lots of exposed labia and near-hardcore footage, as the Countess first bites her victim's breast to draw blood, before ultimately going down on her for a few minutes that culminate in the novel sight of an open, gore-soaked vagina. Strong stuff; typical Franco!

Such is the length of this seduction though (obstensibly a dream-sequence with it's negative-imbued visuals) that it acheives nothing more than further weighing down a plot (?!) already buckling beneath it's snail's pace narrative and severe lack of dialogue. I mean, fine: if you're Rollin in his heyday then let the script take a back seat in favour of cool surreal imagery. But VAMPIRE JUNCTION, though it may attempt it, is not in the same league.

Instead we get endless scenes of Romay wandering around the small village (actually Malaga in Spain, where the picture was shot) sans dialogue, and lots of crappy digitally-realised shots of the lesbian vampire lovers engaging in sexless embraces while their 'master' (an inept Coffin Joe lookalike) flashes onto the screen occasionally with neither purpose nor presence.

All of which sounds dull. Well, it is! Even the subplots (an Indian statue suspected of killing locals, a'la CREEPSHOW 2; a messenger who appears to Romay in a graveyard advising that she must contact Father Flanagan via the Internet for saviour; a shifty sherrif who wages a personal war upon the vampire trio) can't help boost the viewer's interest. More annoyingly, none of these sidetracks are satisfyingly justified either ... VAMPIRE JUNCTION is a movie (read: mess) of few conclusions!

In it's favour, JUNCTION does offer some interesting visual ideas that transcend the usual limitations of shot-on-video guff: Franco's use of light beaming through various windows is particuarly effective, as is the emphasis on the colour red during the notorious seduction scenes.

But all of this is outweighed considerably by lousy dubbing, ugly cast/characters, the director's trademark frequent zoom-ins, the distinct lack of pace (some have attributed this trait of Franco's to being 'lyrical' or 'poetic' - nope, it's just fucking tedious) ...

The best asset this film has, in fact, is the rather unconventional score by Ezequiel Cohen. Filled with radio broadcasts being played backwards, random chimes and unexpected guitar licks, it's the only thing that stopped me crying during the otherwise painfully slow 97 minutes on offer.

Overall, the film plays like a hugely pretentious art student's project film. Not bold or innovative, just crap. Which is not saying much for the 5 decades of experience in filmmaking beneath the director's belt!

VAMPIRE JUNCTION has been given a very solid full-frame transfer from Sub Rosa, and the dubbed English audio holds up well too. It's worth noting that this is the full uncut version of the film too, and it's highly unlikely the BBFC are ever going to consider passing the close-up shot of an exposed, blood spattered muff in the UK!

Extras include a short Spanish video production by aspiring director Julian Lara, entitled EVIL NIGHT, plagued by non-removable English subtitles that were obviously written by someone of foreign tongue! Four teens set up their tent in the woods and are subsequently attacked by flesh-eating zombies. Crude, cheap, naff - but infinitely more entertaining than the disc's main feature!

Loaded with splashy gore FX (and the worst zombie actors ever - very amusing), EVIL NIGHT is a curiously enjoyable waste of 20 minutes. Lara plays the hero, Dario, incidentally.

Elsewhere, a Promo Photo Art Gallery offers a measly 4 DVD covers!

Trailers - as is standard on Sub Rosa DVDs - appear for CHINA WHITE SERPENTINE, I SPIT ON YOUR CORPSE I PISS ON YOUR GRAVE, CHRISTMAS SEASON MASSACRE, INSANIAC and THE UNDERTOW.

Finally, Linnea Quigley (THE RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD) hosts brief video previews for two forthcoming Franco DVDs.

The first is for BLIND TARGET which, she advises, took 4 years to complete. Trying to be whacky while garbed in Army uniform and chomping on a cigar, Linnea sadly just looks tired. Still, this 4 minute sales pitch ends with a full-frontal nude shot of her ... so ...!

Secondly, she covorts on a bed for little under a minute while singing the praises of MARI-COOKIE AND THE KILLER TARANTULA. Despite the diminutive runnig time of this 'preview', Quigley seems definitely fonder of this film.

The disc is Region 0 NTSC and comes in a black keepcase packaging. Static menus include a scene selection page allowing access to the main feature via 12 chapter stops.

A decent DVD package. As for the film? Well, I'm tempted to use the cliche "how the mighty have fallen" ... but has Franco ever really been that essential?!

Review by Stuart Willis