TEENAGE HOOKER BECAME KILLING MACHINE

What a title…seriously, when I saw what Al had sent me for review, I thought "what the hell is this? Haha…nice one Al!"

THBAKM begins with the longest title credits I've seen in a long time. As the credits roll by we're introduced to a girl (our main star I presume) and hear some background music that could be easily confused with music from a Channel 4 Schools' educational programme. After five minutes of this, the film properly starts.

An alleyway, the girl, a man grinning with a strange looking dildo, and strange cabaret music. What on earth? The man chases the girl down the alleyway and then bonks her in rhythm to the cabaret music. This is the film properly started…at least we know that she's THE hooker.

After waking the neighbours her teacher catches her in the middle of the romp. He's a weird looking guy (with Evil Ash style makeup) and they agree that he'll get a "50-Grand package" so that he'll conveniently forget. The 50-Grand package is something to laugh at - they dance to some groovy Korean rock, ride some bikes (well at least there's some riding going on!!), and laugh crazily.

Oh hang on; the riding does occur with the teacher along with more music, this time opera. We then learn she is actually in love with him and she opens her heart to him (I don't know why, he's ugly as sin). A baby is on the way apparently. Big mistake, he murders her and really nasty gore effects follow!!! Oh and so does the opera.

At this point I should stop and not really give anymore hard plot since the film is so short. To summarise, the girl is sewn back together again, brought to life as an assassin, and eventually gets her revenge on the teacher.

THBAKM was actually made in 2000 by South Korean director Nam Ki-Woong. Acclaimed for its Lynch type storytelling, gore, and comedy; yet it remains largely unknown. To be honest, I'm not surprised why, the only things I liked about the film was the music and the scene in the alleyway where the teacher dances. The film is too strange and even seems to outlast its 60 minutes, not a good thing!! Maybe because its Korean and being a Westerner it's difficult for me to appreciate it? Nah, it's just not very good.

However, for a low budget indie film, it does look great. Shot on digital, it's well acted (in a weird Korean Lynch way), and it delivers the gore. The use of music in the film is constructed well and causes some laughs throughout. The gore is realistic enough and revolting in places - always good in my book.

The Third Window Films DVD presents the film in widescreen which is sufficient and it looks fine especially since it was filmed in digital back in 2000. The 2.0 Stereo audio is sharp and the music tracks pump out at you. The DVD is a standard affair with a bunch of trailers of other films on the label and a documentary feature by the director Nam Ki-Woong. Unfortunately the feature is more nonsense that I couldn't be bothered watching all the way through. I guess some folks will watch this…

Not a bad film, not a good film. If you like your flicks to be more Lynch than Lynch (does that make sense?), then this is for you. Otherwise, please stay clear.

Review by Broonage