NAZI ZOMBIE DEATH TALES

(A.k.a. BATTLEFIELD DEATH TALES)

From the same team (and much of the same cast) as the GRINDHOUSE-inspired BORDELLO DEATH TALES of a couple of years back, comes what was originally called (and continues to be so in all other territories than the UK) BATTLEFIELD DEATH TALES. In truth, this original title suits the action better than the NAZI ZOMBIE rebranding for its UK domestic release. Anyone expecting copious amounts of Teutonic deadites will be left feeling a tad short-changed as they are decidedly peripheral to the pulp contained within. However, considering the chequered history this tiny sub-genre has had (ZOMBIE LAKE and OUTPOST were tedious; BLOODRAYNE 3 entertains only when the viewer is pissed; IRON SKY (does that count?) - meh: DEAD SNOW emerges as the best of the bunch so far – and that’s over-rated), we should perhaps count our blessings.

Truer to its original title, then, TALES offers three tales of horror all linked by the more general theme of war. Where it differs from BORDELLO is that there’s no wraparound story this time around.

First out of the stalls is "Medal of Horror", from writer-director James Eaves (BANE; THE WITCHES HAMMER).

In it, soldier George (David Wayman) meets dancer Daisy (Jeanie Wishes) in a club. They hook up and a relationship blossoms, only for her to later receive a telegram informing her of his death in service.

It transpires, however, that George has faked his own death because he’s too chicken to break things off with her.

He’s also a junior office clerk, we learn, who’s terrified of being called to the frontline. Neither of these revelations go down well with his Major (Paul Kelleher), who also happens to be Daisy’s father.

The Major summons a meeting with George and informs him that the thoroughly depressed Daisy has been captured by the Germans. He gives George the opportunity of redeeming his cowardly ways by embarking on what is seen as a suicide mission into enemy territory in the hope of rescuing her.

And that’s when things get crazy, complete with an undead Red Baron (Sam Smith), a karate-chopping zombie and a sexy Nazi cult leader called Jezebel (Tina Barnes). But that’s nothing, compared to a climax which features a batty robot, the best blood-vomiting this side of BLOOD FOR DRACULA and a fairly effective twist ending …

Following in quick succession is Alan Ronald’s more light-hearted offering "Harriet’s War", the most obviously British segment of this portmanteau.

This takes us to the "deepest depths of England" – or, to be more precise, a small village in the 1940s by the name of Chapelton.

Into this backwoods community comes Baba Yaga-like detective Harriet (Lara Lemon). She’s renowned for her investigations into the paranormal and, much to the chagrin of the local priest, has been summoned by the locals to look into the mysterious death of a young man and his girlfriend.

With the help of nice-but-dim copper Jones (Cy Henty), Harriet sets about looking for evidence to support her theory that the victims Jonathan and Christina were killed by something non-human. Although Jones remains convinced that the Nazis are the real culprits.

Jones takes Harriet into the local woods along with local witness/farmer Willard, where they discover evidence to support the female detective’s theory. She calls a meeting with residents in the village hall and tries to warn them of the danger they’re in.

Met, of course, with cynical resistance, it’s left to Harriet to crack this case and save these people from their own fates. Thank goodness Jones is coming round to her way of thinking, especially when he witnesses dead girl Christina alive and kicking …

Finally, we come to Pat Higgins’ "Devils of the Blitz".

This starts as it means to go on: ambitious, with explosive battle scenes illustrating the narrated thoughts of a soldier, Graham (Paul Cousins), at war.

Then we meet the family that Graham is writing to, back home in Blighty: his sister Ruth (Jess Luisa Flynn), their mother Mary (Liza Keast) and the family’s granddad Arthur (Geoffrey Sleight).

Arthur kicks off when he discovers the girls have been receiving correspondence from him, reporting on the atrocities of frontline action.

Ruth leaves home to continue reading Graham’s letter, anxious to learn of his fate in Germany while air raid sirens ring out overhead. Reading on, she learns that Graham was injured in combat but saved from death by a strange, toothed creature that appeared in time to eat his aggressor …

Meanwhile, back in London, Ruth returns home and rushes towards the cellar when the bomb attacks get closer. But the monster from Graham’s battlefield anecdote appears in there – and Arthur seems to know more than he’s letting on …

No-one does horror anthologies quite like the British. From Ealing’s DEAD OF NIGHT, through the Amicus films such as TALES FROM THE CRYPT and ASYLUM, right up to Alex Chandon’s CRADLE OF FEAR – we Brits know how to mount a collection of short genre tales and infuse them with wit, invention and peculiarly home-grown traits.

TALES is no exception to this rule, right from the stylish get go. Characters throughout are unmistakably British in tone and outlook, whereas the wartime settings reinforce the stiff-upper-lip resolve of cliché.

Eaves’ offering is a fine way to open proceedings, a slow builder that explodes after its initial exposition into a mish mash of ideas, drawing on the famed Amicus moulding of dark humour and comic book-type horror that we all know and love. Performances are uneven and the FX don’t always benefit the action, but you can’t deny the level of ambition in evidence.

Most importantly, it’s a fluid and engaging opener, with a central character worth caring for and an agreeable amount of gore come the vomit-heavy finale. It gets too busy for its own good during its latter half, but overall Eaves’ tale is fun: I was left wondering if it may have played better as a feature in its own right.

Ronald’s "Harriet’s War" is lighter in tone and perhaps more entertaining as a result. It looks handsome, is blessed with likeable performances and the script gets the viewer on its side from early on with its simple, coherent approach.

Fast-paced and nightmarishly humorous in a manner not dissimilar to a more restrained "League of Gentlemen", Ronald provides a great slice of stylish intrigue which suggests he could go on to achieve something very special indeed.

Higgins’ film is pretty intense if somewhat undermined by iffy dialogue and bad acting. But keen photography, authentic ambience and a commendable desire to mix horror with social drama bolster it along.

The rubber monsters are a nice hark back to the likes of THE DEADLY SPAWN or THE BOOGENS, making Higgins’ effort immediately identifiable with anyone who shares my love for early 80s creature features. The heavy reliance on dialogue may dissuade some though. Me, I thought it was fine – but, again, this would’ve worked better with a lengthier running time in order to incorporate all of its many ideas in equal measure.

All three segments benefit from decent production values, including colourful lighting filters and oft-times surprisingly elaborate editing. Camera work is attractive throughout.

This may have been a relatively low budget affair (reportedly £50,000.00) but what makes it to the screen looks very accomplished indeed. Some stilted performances and the odd giveaway moment (the dubbed-on crowd noises of the obviously empty pub in the first segment; the rather sparse village gathering in Ronald’s effort; the subdued impact of the bomb attacks in Higgins’ tale) don’t spoil the impressive overall result.

Anachronisms are rife, such as incorrect uniforms and modern locations that will be instantly recognisable to those local enough, but they hardly matter: just disengage that part of your brain and enjoy. Indeed, the film opens with a most welcome Monty Python-esque disclaimer from the three directors, apologising in advance for taking massive historical liberties during their storytelling …

The screener disc provided presented NAZI ZOMBIE DEATH TALES (the onscreen title is the aforementioned BATTLEFIELD DEATH TALES) in an excellent 2.35:1 transfer, enhanced for 16x9 televisions.

Colours were accurate and stable, blacks were solid and images were sharp throughout. I’d imagine the film was shot on HD, possibly even a RED camera (?), given the clarity of the image on display.

Likewise, the English 2.0 stereo audio was very good for the duration.

This screener disc had no extras or menus. I understand the retail disc will offer a plethora of bonus features. I’ll be grabbing myself one.

Whichever title you prefer to refer to this film by, it remains an impressive achievement and provides solid entertainment throughout. The three directors plan to continue with their DEATH TALES anthology series, and I for one look forward to which theme they’ll opt for next.

Review by Stuart Willis