THE HITCHER

From Platinum Dunes, the Michael Bay-led production company that gave us the remakes of THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE and THE AMITYVILLE HORROR ...

Jim (Zachary Knighton, SURFER DUDE) meets up with his new girlfriend Grace (Sophia Bush, STAY ALIVE) one sunny morning and they embark on a road journey across Middle America to visit her friends.

The sun continues to shine through the afternoon, with Jim driving while Grace reads a girl magazine and they generally lark around. So far, so REST STOP.

Come the evening, they're still driving along as the rain starts to come down hard. Jim has to swerve to avoid a hitchhiker stood in the middle of the road, thumb protruding, next to a stationery vehicle.

As Jim pulls over a few metres further up the road, he contemplates picking the hitcher up. Grace is dead-set against the idea, thinking he looks a little odd. To be fair, he still hasn't moved an inch despite almost being knocked over.

Jim finally agrees to carry on with their journey, but has trouble getting his car started - as the hitcher advances towards them. The car finally bursts into life as the hitcher is almost upon them and they race off into the night.

Jim and Grave continue their journey into the following morning, putting this minor event behind them. But the hitcher turns up later at a rest stop where they have chosen to dine. He recognises them, so Jim reluctantly agrees to give the hitcher - John Ryder (Sean Bean, OUTLAW; SILENT HILL) - a lift. But he soons regrets it when Ryder's attentions fall on Grace (asking Jim in front of her whether she's a good fuck) and he pulls a knife on the stunned pair.

On this occasion, Jim manages to literally boot Ryder from his moving car. But the hitcher has a habit of catching up with his quarry, and the nightmare is far from over for Jim and Grace ...

If you've seen Robert Harmon's original THE HITCHER, you'll know roughly where this is all headed. The remake offers precious few surprises (Grace is a new addition, and she becomes our main focus in the second half). If you haven't seen the original, you really should - it's far superior than this.

Although THE HITCHER remake isn't technically bad. It looks great, with lovely widescreen outdoor cinematography, an abundance of slick sunlit desert horizons to take in and an attractive cast. The score is agreeable enough, the editing is tight and the performances are solid. Even Bean, who can be hit-or miss (more miss for me, to be honest), gives a carefully nuanced performance that eschews the predicted wide-eyed banshee theatrics and delivers something altogether quieter - a consequently more sinister and believable portrayal of what could have easily been comically overplayed. In fact, he's almost as convincing as Rutger Hauer was in the original.

But there's the main problem. Bean isn't as good as Hauer was. And Knighton lacks the charisma of C Thomas Howell (now there's an insult). And while director Dave Meyers (numerous music promo videos to his name prior to this) knows how to film action scenes, and has a keen eye for polished visuals, he lacks Harmon's savvy for sustaining tension.

No matter how many explosions Michael Bay's money can buy you, they're no substitute for a forgotten little technique called suspense.

Also, while other recent remakes have been successful because they've updated cult 70s horrors that no doubt look ropey in their execution to today's audiences, THE HITCHER - Harmon's 1986 original - still looks pretty fucking good. Apart from the obvious stuff - mobile phones, the grungy look of the leads - this remake has nothing new to offer whatsoever, making it totally redundant.

Going back to the sorry lack of suspense (a key feature of the original). It's been replaced here with designer gore. And it's all decidedly unimaginative gore FX on offer, well-executed but instantly forgettable - tame, too, if you've been raised on stuff like MANIAC, FRIDAY THE 13TH or even the SAW movies.

Then there's the characters. While Howell gave Jim a nerdy yet sympathetic persona in the original, the remake's Jim and Grace are cocky arrogant middle-class American teens who look down their noses at anyone who works in a gas station, speaks with a Southern accent etc. You know the type - they seem to be the "victims" in every glossy American horror film these days. Attractive, and not remotely likeable. And that kind of sums up this film too.

The R2 disc serves up a great anamorphic 2.35:1 transfer of the uncut film. Images are crisp and pin-sharp, with great colour balance, solid flesh tones and vibrant images. The transfer complements the polished cinematography perfectly.

5.1 audio mixes are available in English and Spanish. I concentrated on the English track, which was a good solid job. Optional subtitles are also available in English and Spanish.

Extras include a 13-minute video diary-style behind-the-scenes featurette from the actors' point of view. There's little of technical worth on offer here.

Next are 8 deleted scenes presented in non-anamorphic 2.35:1. These are shown in what would be chronological order were they re-inserted into the movie, and last a total of 22 minutes. It's safe to say the film isn't harmed by their removal from the final cut.

ROADKILL: THE ULTIMATE CAR CRASH is a 10-minute featurette on the shooting of a particular set-piece scene.

FUEL YOUR FEAR: THE MAKING OF THE HITCHER is the usual mix of on-set cast and crew interviews, intercut with behind-the-scenes footage.

Finally, we get CHRONICLES OF A KILLER - a 5-minute mock US TV news broadcast.

All bonus features play with optional English or Spanish subtitles.

THE HITCHER is efficient enough as modern studio horror pictures go, even if it does suffer from unsympathetic protagonists and a tendency to replace suspense with lame gore. Bean is surprisingly reliable as Ryder. But, with Harmon's original still looking and feeling fresh in itself, the overall feeling when watching this remake is: Why?

Review by Stu Willis