GRINDHOUSE TRASH COLLECTION 2

Another 3 oddities from the halcyon days of early 70's smut, presented across 2 discs by those fine folk at After Hours.

Disc 1 proffers IN-FLIGHT SERVICE, which opens with bespectacled blonde air stewardess Jenny cleaning the floor of an empty aeroplane. She bumps into the captain and they promptly start getting it on.

Meanwhile, Jenny's old neighbour Bob has travelled all the way from the sticks to deliver flowers to her new apartment in the city. Jenny's not home, but her roommate Judy invites Bob in for a chat. And a shag.

When Jenny finishes her business with the captain, she returns home to discover Judy and Bob at it. They don't notice her at first, which gives Jenny the opportunity to spy on them while giving herself a fiddle. When Judy spots Jenny she drags her up on to the settee with them.

The next day, Jenny goes to work as a stewardess and is raped by two sharp-dressed businessmen on the aeroplane. Coincidentally, Judy is also raped while outside a strip club. Both girls wind up enjoying their ordeals, before getting together with a few random males wearing false noses for a bizarre orgiastic finale.

There is virtually no plot for this movie. I know plots are hardly important in pornos, but it's nice to have some kind of narrative to cling to, however flimsy. But this is just incomprehensible nonsense that goes absolutely nowhere.

What's more, the film is shot REALLY unattractively, has an ugly cast and suffers from a really distracting inapt music score. But worst of all, this is a softcore version of the movie (apparently the only version left in existence) - so even the sex is poor.

We get to see some penetration and genitalia, but it's all kept to brief second-or-two shots. And if money shots are your thing, you might as well go straight to disc 2 as there are none here.

The lead actress who plays Jenny is actually a transsexual, and the film was directed by Charles Lamont (NEON NIGHTS). And they are the two most interesting things I have to say about IN-FLIGHT SERVICE.

Disc 1 does at least provide some entertaining trailers, which on this occasion include FORCED ENTRY, THE GRINDHOUSE HOSTAGE COLLECTION, BIBI: CONFESSIONS OF SWEET SIXTEEN and 8 more.

Disc 2 kicks off with FIRES DOWN BELOW.

This one starts off quite well, with an atmospheric handheld POV tracking shot around an old-fashioned house one dreary afternoon. The camera then rests on a pretty young widow sat bemoaning her lot: "My life is so empty since Brian was killed in Vietnam". Cue stock black-and-white footage of soldiers at war in 'Nam.

All this moaning leads the widow into a protracted fumble, bringing herself to climax seconds before her telephone rings. She answers the call, which is from one of Brian's old army buddies, Chuck. Still feeling hot under the collar, the widow invites Chuck over.

When Chuck arrives he's led into the living room where the pair chat while he smokes a cigarette. Then it's straight upstairs for some excruciatingly slow and overlong sex. This must impress the widow, as shortly afterwards she asks Chuck to move in with her.

But Chuck is not all that he seems. He's a swinger, as the widow discovers when she walks in on him fucking with another couple. A huge row ensues, which is interrupted by the news that the widow's friend is on her way to visit, with her new husband.

This leads to more screwing, as the visitors make good use of the guest room while the widow spies on them through a crack in the door.

The following morning, Chuck sits with the visiting couple and gets to know then a bit better. You get the impression that this is all going to end in an almighty gangbang that even the widow will succumb to ... but we never find out.

Alas, "The End" suddenly appears on the screen, midway through a scene. It transpires that the final 20 minutes of FIRES DOWN BELOW are "lost"!

How very frustrating. Which leaves it up to the final film MELVIN KISSEM to make it all worthwhile. And it tries valiantly.

MELVIN KISSEM (I have no idea what the title means) spins the yarn of three young secretaries who meet up on the street one afternoon to discuss how horny they are. They then debate over what type of men they each prefer, then despatch to do something about their unfulfilled desires.

By pure coincidence, all three women ring the same stud service and arrange to meet their respective male prostitutes at the same hotel.

Initially unaware of this, the girls meet their studs in individual rooms and the action cuts between each couple as the men service their clients. Afterwards, the group convenes on an orange bed and the men agree to stick around ... of the women will now service them.

And so MELVIN KISSEM reaches it's climax (sic) as all three couples get it on one big bed, sweat pouring as freely as the cum.

What separates MELVIN KISSEM from the other films - and from a lot of other pornos from it's era - is that it has an attractive young cast, who seem to genuinely get along and enjoy flirting with one another. It's quite refreshing to see the girls laughing with the boys and vice versa.

It's no masterpiece by any stretch of the imagination, but it was nice to see reasonably good-looking women (and men) who seemed to actually enjoy what they were doing. The sex itself is nothing out of the ordinary, although if anal is your thing you'll pleased to know there is one scene of it here (the other two features in this collection avoid it).

None of the films on offer are essential viewing, and will appeal only to completists of obscure 70s smut. After Hours should be commended for mastering these movies from their original 16mm materials, and putting them together in one affordable 2-disc package.

The films themselves are presented in their original full-frame ratios and don't look too bad. Yes, there are scratches aplenty and more than a few vertical lines - print damage that sadly can't be rectified - but each movie is at least free from excess grain and very watchable. Images are clear, bright and sharp throughout, with MELVIN KISSEM coming out looking the best.

Each film is equipped with its original English mono soundtrack. Although there's some hiss evident at times, these are generally sound jobs.

Although there's no scene-selection menu pages on offer here, each film can be travelled through by way of your remote control handset. SERVICE has 9 chapters, FIRES has 11 and MELVIN has 8.

Finally, inside the keepcase there's a respectable 8-page booklet with colour photographs, reviews by "The After Hours Collector" and some thoughts on IN-FLIGHT SERVICE by Lamont.

Not as much fun as the DIARY OF A NYMPH COLLECTION.

Review by Stu Willis