A FEAST OF FLESH

Terri (Stacey Bartlebaugh-Gmys, SPLATTER MOVIE: THE DIRECTOR'S CUT) is dragged down an alley one evening and beaten by a thug. A woman emerges from the shadows and bites the thug on the neck, then literally tears his face off. The woman leans over to check that Terri's okay. Terru thanks her mysterious saviour, and asks if she can take her in, and teach her how to do what she just did ...

Meanwhile, John (Steve Foland) has a complementary ticket entitling four people to a free trial at the local brothel, Bathory House. He shows it to his friends, Jess (Zoe Hunter) and Aaron (Jeff Waltrowski), who are to be married soon but want to try a threesome first. They agree to join John to the brothel, but are a little disgruntled when he suggests bringing along his friend Seth (Aaron Bernard).

However, Seth declines. He's just not in the mood for sex since his girlfriend Terri left him a month ago ...

When John, Jess and Aaron arrive at the brothel, they're greeted by voluptuous madame Elizabeth (Amy Lynn Best) who offers a selection of her finest girls.

Jess and Aaron choose the girl they want to sleep with but John, upon noticing Terri is one of the girls, makes his excuses and bails.

Which wasn't a bad decision, as Jess and Aaron soon discover. The brothel is actually a home for sexy vampires who have sex with their clients ... then devour them.

John returns to Seth, who is quietly getting drunk in a bar. Upon learning that Terri has not gone to pursue her dreams in New York as he'd suspected, but is actually working in the local brothel, Seth becomes adamant that they must go there so he can win her back.

Their conversation is overheard by Tom (Bill Homan), who warns them that if they go to the brothel they'll never return alive. When the pair respond with confusion, he takes them to his friend Sheridan (Mike Watt, THE RESURRECTION GAME) to learn more.

Sheridan, an Irish immigrant, explains that a treaty has been existence between he and the brothel for many years, meaning Bathory House could not take in any new girls. He suggests that they go and rescue Terri, and deliver "a message" to Madame Elizabeth at the same time.

John and Seth understandably have no idea what is going on and are initially reluctant to participate - Seth just wants Terri back - but when their new friends produce guns, they feel compelled to go along with the plan.

But when Sheridan and friends claim Terri back from the brothel and burn Elizabeth's face as a warning against vampirising anyone else, the stage is set for a war between the Irishman's mob of vampire hunters and the sultry bloodsuckers. Somewhere along the line, the witless Seth and John may even realise what's happening ...

A FEAST OF FLESH joins an over-saturated market rife with cheap erotic vampire movies shot on digital. However, it scores points with an occasionally witty script, some likeable character and an emphasis on gore rather than boobies.

Indeed, the sex element of FLESH is very tame - and it doesn't hurt the pace none. The gore FX are shoddy but enthusiastic, and there's plenty of blood splattering across the screen.

Performances are largely wooden (director Watts wisely has his script make reference to his phoney Irish accent - it really is terrible), but it's hardly the type of film you watch looking for Oscar worthy acting.

The women are typically hot (the cast also includes Seduction favourite Debbie Rochon) and in keeping with this decade's trendiest horror film must-have, there's a "twist" ending that brings events round full cycle. It's not art, but it's moderately entertaining.

Bloody Earth's disc presents the uncut, unrated version of the film in 1.66:1. It's a nice transfer, with bright colours and sharp images.

The English 2.0 audio is equally proficient.

Although there's no scene-selection menu, the film can be navigated through using your remote control handset, via 17 chapters.

Bonus features include a commentary track from Watt and Best, who also acted as the film's producer. It's a fairly entertaining listen, with plenty of chuckling in-between the attempts at offering insight into the shoot.

An 18-minute Making Of documentary doesn't offer much behind-the-scenes footage, but does serve plenty of cast and crew interviews.

5 minutes of bloopers follow, under the heading of "Gag Reel".

The best extra on offer is a short film entitled "Feast of Souls". Directed by Josh Smith, this is 34-minute loose adaptation of "Dante's Inferno" that centres around a man who witnesses his friends die in the woods one day, and is then haunted by the ghost of a black girl. It's an odd piece, quietly absorbing and certainly worth checking out.

There's also a brief biography of Smith on offer, and a link for aspiring filmmakers to send in their own short films, with the possibility of them cropping up on future Bloody Earth releases.

Finally, we get trailers for KILLING SPREE, AMERICAN PUNKS and BLOOD AND SEX NIGHTMARE.

There are far too many "erotic vampire" movies being made cheaply for direct-to-DVD sale nowadays. A FEAST OF FLESH at least offers some decent gore, but whether that's enough to make it stand out in the long run is highly questionable.

As a curious point of trivia, Aaron Bernard acted as Orlando Bloom's stand-in on PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN 3: AT WORLD'S END ...!

Review by Stu Willis