EURO-SEX COMEDY COLLECTION

EURO-SEX COMEDY COLLECTION

A 2-disc set from the ever generous perverts at Secret Key Motion Pictures, this time offering four softcore Eurosploitation epics from the heady days of the late 70s and early 80s.

Disc one provides the double-headed threat of THE PUSSYCAT SYNDROME and THE SINFUL BED.

THE PUSSYCAT SYNDROME (A.k.a. ORGIA STIN KERKYRA; TOCHTER DER VENUS; ORGY IN CORFU) stems from the early 80s, and is probably most notable for co-starring Ajita Wilson (SADOMANIA; CONTRABAND; BLACK DEEP THROAT).

Here, Wilson portrays Donna. She and fellow glamour model Gloria (Tina Eklund) are in sunny Greece for a photo shoot, conducted by a camp middle-aged bloke with the hots for Donna.

They're scheduled to travel to New York the following day for more work. However, the two girls decide instead to ditch working in favour of fucking. They tell their photographer Francois - much to his exasperation - that they are staying for a week to "holiday". He agrees, on the condition that they follow him to New York in seven days' time.

And so, the photo crew leave for the airport, leaving Donna and Gloria free to wander into Greece to hire a car. Within minutes, the pair have pulled over in their jeep to pick a couple of folk-singing hitch-hikers. And yes, it's not long before the four of them are getting jiggy on the beach. But not before some cringe-inducing musical shenanigans en route.

After this tame but energetic beginning, our heroines bump into the car rental bloke again. He invites them and their little-dicked hippy boyfriends onto a nearby yacht. Here they are introduced to Captain Nico (Herbert Hofer) who welcomes them onboard.

Nico initially seems to be a dirty old man, spying on the youths as they fuck. But despite his wealth, he is unhappy - the fire has gone from his own marriage. Can these two vital young women help put the spice back into his lovelife?

Hairy bushes, soft sex, conspicuous tan lines and cheerful bubblegum music ("do it, do it, do it nice, do it rough, do it till I've had enough" ...) help keep your pecker up while you stick around to find out.

Eklund is a sexy co-lead, with a wonderful fuller figure. Wilson, of course, was infamous for being a transsexual (even though it remains an unconfirmed story - as the DVD booklet says, "if she's a guy, she's sure got a hell of an ass"). It's uncomfortable watching her frequently naked performance though.

All performances are however chirpy (there's so much dancing going on!) and pacing is brisk, bolstered by that put-a-smile-on-your-face pop soundtrack.

Sure, the story is wafer-thin bunkum and the scenes are episodic in their unfolding. But this isn't Shakespeare - this is the Europeans shamelessly trying to break the box office with cheap softcore thrills.

I'm not sure how this qualifies as a comedy though? Light, yes. Funny - hmm, not intentionally ...

The film is credited in the opening titles to Irvin Miles, but was actually directed by Ilias Mylonakos.

THE SINFUL BED (A.k.a. DAS SUNDIGE BETT) was directed by Ralf Gregan in 1973, and is much more accomplished in terms of editing and script.

Beneath the opening titles, a young couple have a post-coital conversation that stems from the woman's dissatisfaction from being "balled" on a mattress on the floor. She threatens to abstain from sex until her fella buys her a nice big bed to fuck in.

So they go to an antique shop and excitedly shop for a bed - they need it, urgently! As they look around, an old brass bed begins narrating to the screen ...

The bed is gutted to have been discarded after serving lovers for the last 100 years. It's certain the young lovers won't be interested in him, but the girl loves it - and the shopkeeper manages to talk the reluctant man into buying it.

The bed continues to narrate as the lovestruck couple push the bed back home. As their excited babbling continues, the bed begins to tell us about some of the more adventurous conquests that have been conducted upon him - from 1908 onwards ...

Cue some cheap, unconvincing period costume-type vignettes, all a little too concerned with exposition but thankfully throwing in mildly amusing dialogue along with more softcore fumbling.

Again, this is an episodic film that sags badly in it's middle section. However, a more fluent script helps this German production hold the attention a little better than PUSSYCAT.

The plinky-plinky music is repetitive and annoying, but overall this is an agreeably harmless film with a good nature and some decent-looking women. But at 84 minutes in length, it simply goes on for too long.

Over on disc two, the fun kicks off with 1977's THE EXHIBITIONIST (A.k.a. CANDIDO EROTICO; A MAN FOR SALE; THE EXHIBITIONISTS; LOOK AT ME; COPENHAGEN NIGHTS; DEEP LOVE).

This feels like the most professionally produced film of the four on offer - it boasts decent cinematography and something akin to production values.

In it, Wilson again plays a glamour model. We first see her writhing around in a lesbian clinch with a pretty blonde, for the benefit of a female photographer Veronique (Maria Baxa).

Male prostitute Carlo (Mircha Carven) turns up at Veronique's studio after three months of absence, requesting the use of her shower. She obliges, and then quizzes him on his disappearance. He doesn't give much away and is indignant to the bollocking she gives him. He's too intrigued by the nude photographs of her pretty stepdaughter Charlotte (Lilli Carati), on the studio wall ...

Still, Veronique lets Carlo stay around as he performs well in the live sex shows she puts on. This progresses to him fucking Veronique for $500 a time, paid for by her wealthy husband Paul (Marco Gugliemi) - on the condition that he can spy on them while they're at it.

Carlo takes to this surprisingly well - even when Paul joins them in the lovemaking. But before long our moustachioed hero gets to meet Charlotte when she pops in on Paul at home - and the attraction is instantly mutual.

Much to everyone's distaste, Carlo and Charlotte strike up a relationship and fall very much in love. However, there's a problem: Carlo can no longer get it up unless he's being watched ...!

There are some very stylish and colourful sequences interwoven into THE EXHIBITIONIST, which play as surrealism in their theatrical delivery. The use of classical music further adds to their allure. These scenes are infrequent, but striking enough to stick in the mind after the film has finished.

Good looking, inventive and accomplished, THE EXHIBITIONIST feels a little out of place in this set. Stylistically, it stands head and shoulders above the other three. Again though, I fail to see how this meets the criteria of being a "comedy". A tragic-comedy at the most, and a very subtle one at that ...

No matter, with it's striking visuals and keen editing, this is a film of minor note. Wilson only appears briefly, but that's okay because the attractive young coupling of Carati and Carven steal the show (Carati's beautiful, it must be said). And despite the 95-minute running time, there's enough forays into the baroque sex shows here to hold the attention (they come across as a mix of THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS and CAFE FLESH, set to classical scores - albeit, it's all softcore stuff).

Sex, while soft, is pretty hot in this well acted, decently scripted but poorly dubbed curiosity.

Finally, Secret Key have saved the Laura Gemser-starrer LOVE CAMP for last. Filmed in 1981 by Christian Anders, the film is also known as DIE TODESGOTTIN DES LIEBESCAMPS; DIVINE EMANUELLE; DIVINE EMANUELLE: LOVE CULT; LOVE CULT).

The film begins on a Greek island where blonde Owen Wilson-lookalike Dorian (writer-director Anders) leads a hippy cult a'la Jim Jones, gracing his members with flower necklaces and encouraging them to sing along to his hideous folk songs.

In-between preaching to his minions asking them to give up their belongings and follow him, Dorian's eye is attracted to pretty tourist Patricia (Simone Brahmann).

The female members of the cult - known as the Children of Light - are encouraged by Dorian to sell their wares to local males, affording us a few softcore love-ins during the film's first half.

But when Patricia calls in on Dorian to introduce himself after being struck by one of his public speeches, she learns that the true leader of the cult is the mysterious "Divine One" (Gemser). Our first glimpse of the sex-mad Divine One is of her bathing her beautiful black skin, whilst flanked by her muscular bodyguard Tanga (Sascha Borysenko).

After her bathtime frolics, the Divine One speaks to Dorian over a monitor and is intrigued to hear that Patricia - the daughter of a wealthy US senator - has introduced herself to the cult. Seeing this as a financially viable enterprise, the Divine One plots her seduction of the gullible ...

Cheap, tawdry, frayed around the edges - this isn't a quality film by any stretch of the imagination. It is, however, strangely watchable. It's always nice to see Gemser and her soulmate Gabriele Tinti in a film together, and both perform to their usual wooden but photogenic specifics here. I'm not complaining.

The film is evenly paced, nicely photographed (although the blurry transfer does it's best to hide this) and filled with deliciously over-ripe dialogue. The cult storyline is always enjoyable (I even sat through AMBUSH IN WACO), so I enjoyed seeing how this panned out - no surprises in store though, alas!

Sex is provided at regular intervals, and is of the softcore type associated with D'Amato: the occasional visual flourish, but mostly aggressive and impassive. At least the Greek locations are hot!

Still, if you're a fan of Gemser, this should be a treat: she's still skinny, but there's a little more meat on her arse than normal here - that's a good thing. She looks stunning.

Her appearance, while taking a time to reveal herself, makes it almost worth listening to the atrocious "love, love, love" song that keeps getting sung over and over ... if only so you can witness the amusing English dubbing given to her character ...

LOVE CAMP is a rubbish film, but has it's appeal. You know it's poor, but keep watching regardless. Lesbianism, self-flagellation, a bizarre song-and-dance number midway through ("have you heard the word?"): perfect rainy Sunday afternoon viewing, in other words. Well, it beats the "EastEnders" omnibus, surely ...?

Once more, though, it's tough to concede that LOVE CAMP is a comedy. Funny, yes. But by accident rather than design. How do you suppose it ends though? Go on, guess ...

The films are each presented in 1.33:1. The films appear to be correctly framed, with no discernible information blatantly cropped or compromised. That is, apart from THE EXHIBITIONIST. That's presented in non-enhanced 1.85:1 during the opening titles, then blows up to a full-frame presentation. The cruel irony of this is that it's the one film that you'd imagine an original aspect ratio screening would improve ...

I did investigate further to clarify the original aspect ratios of the films contained herein, but could only deduce that LOVE CAMP was indeed intended to be seen in 1.33:1.

Transfers are a mixture of the so-so, the murky and the frankly worn-out. Specks and vertical lines are infrequent as is minor grain, so none of these hamper the viewing pleasure. On the contrary: they add to the sleazy vibe.

Visual softness may be an issue for the less forgiving viewer: these films resemble old VHS quality.

Each film is graced with it's original English dubbed audio, presented in serviceable but unremarkable mono. Minor hiss is evident here and there, but it never poses a great problem. Dialogue is audible in all films, albeit a little muffled or quiet at times. At least those kooky scores come through clearly!

Beyond the static scene-selection menu page on each disc, there are no scene-selection menus. But each film has it's own remote-access chapters. PUSSYCAT has 11 chapters; BED has 12; EXHIBITIONIST has 15; CAMP has 17.

Each disc also has the option of choosing the "Grind It! Play All" function, allowing for an uninterrupted double-bill showing, grindhouse-style.

The only disc extras per se come on disc two, in the form of trailers. These are for A TOUCH OF GENIE, BEYOND THE BUSTY STAGS, BUSTY STAG COLLECTION, GRINDHOUSE TRASH, GRINDHOUSE TRASH 3, SKIN IN THE 50S, SKIN IN THE 60S, SWINGING IN THE 70S.

The two discs are housed in a neat 2-DVD keepcase, which contains that aforementioned booklet - an attractive fold-out effort consisting of 6 pages in colour. The booklet benefits from decent liner notes by The After Hours Collector, a few nice colour photographs and two welcome reproductions of original poster art for THE SINFUL BED.

A curious, perhaps misleadingly named set. But it's great to see a couple of relatively obscure films turn up on DVD in English-friendly releases. THE EXHIBITIONIST is a genuinely worthy film, but it's a shame about the aspect ratio concerns.

CAMP is arguably the best-known film here, and was originally mistakenly released onto UK DVD by Blackhorse Entertainment under the title of video nasty SS EXPERIMENT CAMP (as bizarre as that sounds!) due to a cock-up a few years back. I gather from the always excellent Melon Farmers site that this has since been rectified by a reissue.

LOVE CAMP is worth seeing because, although it's not a comedy, it's often funny as fuck: check out the fight between Dorian and Tanga. PUSSYCAT is a curiosity piece, while BED is insane in affable way. THE EXHIBITIONIST is a film worthy of it's own showcase.

Ajita and Laura fans will love this package, and it comes at a very nice price when considering what it offers ...

Review by Stuart Willis


 
Released by Secret Key
Region 1 - NTSC
Not Rated
Extras :
see main review
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