MYSTERIOUS ISLAND

More vintage fun rescued from the archives of the public domain by those fine folk at Cheezy Flicks.

This time around, we’re getting Columbia Pictures’ 1951 serial adaptation of Jules Verne’s classic novel "L’Ile Mysterieuse". Split across 15 breathless episodes, director Spencer Gordon Bennett’s surprisingly ambitious melodrama spans 4 hours in what feels like no time at all.

Episode 1, ‘Lost in Space’, starts in typically hurried style, earnest narrator Knox Manning introducing us to March 1865, and the "great war between the two States". That’s the American Civil War to you and I. In particular, we hone in on the battle for the occupation of the town of Richmond.

It’s here that we meet Yankee Captain Harding (Richard Crane), overseeing Southern convicts working on a chain gang. He’s ordered to go on a scouting mission into the nearby desert, and is quickly picked up by Confederates.

Now a prisoner himself, Harding is desperate to escape from his admittedly comfortable-looking confinement. A week later, he’s approached by news reporter Spillett (Hugh Prosser), a fellow captive in Richmond who’s also looking for a way out.

Together, the pair hatches a plan along with Spillett’s friends to take advantage of an observational hot air balloon that hovers just outside the town. The group, completed by Spillett’s servant Neb (Bernie Hamilton), nautical Pencroft (Marshall Reed) and his adopted son Bert (Ralph Hodges), make their daring escape bid under cover of darkness.

The plan succeeds and the motley group seize control of the balloon, making off into the night sky. But … an electrical storm ensues, and by the time they next see daylight, the group has landed on a faraway beach shore where spacemen exist that are capable of disappearing through stone walls …

With Harding missing following their crash-landing, the remaining group spread out to survey their new surroundings. They write off the sight of a strange object falling to the ground in the distance as a meteor, but we know better: it’s actually a spaceship belonging to gorgeous Rulu (Karen Randle) from the planet Mercury.

Chapter 2 is perhaps self-explanatory, being entitled ‘Sinister Savages’. Our intrepid castaways fall foul of a native tribe who worship the nearby volcano and recoil when it erupts. If you think that sounds weird, just wait till they discover the pirate boat incoming on the horizon.

In chapter 4, the group encounters a Neanderthal man called Ayrton (Terry Frost). In chapter 6, Spillett and the gang must defend themselves against the aforementioned pirates, who have returned to the island to retrieve their supplies (which, in fairness, our heroes have stolen from them). Later, when they establish contact with Rulu and her small crew, our heroes – reunited with Harding by this time, of course - discover that she is in search of a radioactive element capable of creating an explosion great enough to wipe out Earth.

So, yes, things do indeed get weirder and weirder as the action proceeds. Increasingly, the screenplay – co-written by Lewis Clay, Royal K Cole and George H Plympton – makes no sense and rushes by so quickly that it all just becomes a dizzying myriad of macho one-liners delivered woodenly, amusingly unconvincing fist-fights and cheap sets. Oh, and let’s not forget the "special effects", which include hilarious spaceships on strings and some of the clumsiest giant insects ever committed to celluloid. Manning’s occasional narration (quick recaps at the beginning of each 21-minute chapter; ‘Batman’-style cliffhanger posers at their close) soon become the only semblance of plot.

MYSTERIOUS ISAND is very difficult to synopsise as a result. In fact, I could synopsise it but it’s so busy and action-packed that I’d be writing pages and pages of the stuff.

Suffice it to say, as the brainchild of prolific serial producer "Jungle" Sam Katzman (EARTH VERSUS THE FLYING SAUCERS, IT CAME FROM BENEATH THE SEA etc), viewers can expect a great deal of melodramatic music, risible acting, and more: ray guns, UFOs and even Captain fucking Nemo (Leonard Penn)!

But, guess what? Its flaws are MYSTERIOUS ISLAND’s greatest assets and only those without a soul could fail to qualify this as fantastic fun.

The DVD is a region free affair and contains all 15 episodes of the original theatrical serial, presented here in what seems very close to being their original academy aspect ratio of 1.37:1. The monochrome images on offer are, as you’d no doubt expect, a little ropey. Soft, exhibiting the obvious damage associated with such aged material, and plagued with what occasionally appears to be video artefacting. Still, some faded blacks and unsightly edge enhancement aside, it should all be perfectly watchable for the forgiving aficionado.

Likewise, the English mono audio track provided is not always in the best shape. Expect minor hiss on occasion, and even the rare occurrence of drop-out. Overall though, despite slight muffling, it offers an acceptable playback when taking its age into consideration.

The disc opens to a static main menu page. From there, a static scene-selection menu allows access to the feature via 15 chapters – episode by episode, no less.

Extras begin with "Intermission Time", a 4-minute colour cinema commercial for pizza from a bygone era.

We also get a 9-minute promo reel advertising a selection of other titles in the Cheezy Flicks roster: JUNGLE DRUMS OF AFRICA, ZOMBIES OF THE STRATOSPHERE, THE MONSTER AND THE APE, FACE OF THE SCREAMING WEREWOLF, THE LOST MISSILE, DESTINATION INNER SPACE and THE NAVY VERSUS THE NIGHT MONSTERS. All of these trailers/TV spots are presented in full-frame, and all are black-and-white save for the latter two titles.

MYSTERIOUS ISLAND is a gloriously silly, hurricane-paced and – appropriately enough – cheesy relic from the 1950s, and one which can’t fail but to entertain in frequent bursts. It’s high drama all the way, and it’s a guiltily great way to kill 4 hours and 4 minutes of your time.

Review by Stuart Willis