Broken Dolls

Now I know I recently referred to Jess Franco as a hack (when reviewing the trashy but fun 'Killer Barbys') but I'll admit I was wrong. He's more than that, he's not just a hack but he's a sleazy old perv hack at that! Now before Franco's delusional legion of fans come hunting me down flaming torches in hand I must explain that I mean this in the nicest possible sense!?

It seems every DVD label (and their grannies) are licensing Franco product for their catalogue, I'm not sure just why this is (perhaps because they're so cheap?) but obviously there's a market for the old boys work out there. So the latest company to jump on the Franco bandwagon is US underground favourites Sub Rosa with their new Sub Rosa Blue line.

Admittedly when I first noticed a double bill release of 'Broken Dolls' and 'Helter Skelter' being solicited I got quite excited, was this to be a (somewhat mismatched but welcome) presentation of Naschy's underrated 'Blue Eyes of the Broken Doll' and the similarly excellent vintage Manson movie 'Helter Skelter'? Nope, this was to be another nickel and dime Jess Franco collection. But would this double bill of Franco fun be another predictable flaccid let down or would it be one of those rarities that somehow is a Franco delight?

Annoyingly this double bill is an example of both extremes. Curiously 'Broken Dolls' is packaged as the man feature here. A tedious yawn inducing yarn of extreme proportions, 'Broken Dolls' follows a small ensemble cast of Franco regulars (including the legendary Lina Romay) fawning around the beach (well it's Malaga under the guise of a secluded island) and well…not doing much. The wafer thin premise is that retired actor Don Martin is sleazing around said island with his close loved ones who are only still there as they want to get their hands on his alleged hidden fortune.

At 83 minutes 'long' 'Broken Dolls' is one of those all too familiar Franco endurance tests, in fact you can probably watch the movie in fast forward and still be bored senseless with the lack of onscreen activity. You notice very early on (in fact during the opening sequence) that not only is this film going nowhere fast but Franco's skills behind the camera are growingly dismal, I've steadier camerawork on a pensioners holiday videos, which is in fact what this is (albeit by a horny old man). Occasionally interspersing a grade z holiday video with some soft-core shenanigans does not a movie make and with 'Broken Dolls' Franco hits new levels of dreadful filmmaking.

Thankfully, just as you're losing your will to live Franco completely turns things on their heels with this discs other full length feature…'Helter Skelter'. Now don't get me wrong, 'Helter Skelter' is not a classic of any note worthy substance but what it does do is what in reality Franco fans want but are too afraid to come out and say. Bereft of any plot whatsoever 'Helter Skelter' is Euro filth at its absolute best. Packaged bewilderingly as some sort of de Sade head fuck, 'Helter Skelter' is quite simply one big Euro wank fest. Sure it looks stylish (and welcomingly so) but basically what you get is scene after scene of gorgeous women fondling and masturbating for your viewing pleasure.

'Helter Skelter' will please many on very differing levels, I have no doubt Franco's faithful fans will absolutely delight in the dizzyingly good art house stylings. Franco's direction is impressive throughout, which is bewilderingly frustrating considering the polarly opposite dreadful work presented in 'Broken Dolls'. For those of you (like myself) who don't care much for the old boys work of late you'll derive great pleasure if only for the sake of grabbing your dick in hand and getting off to truly filthy Franco fun. In honesty 'Helter Skelter' probably epitomizes Franco's current psyche, perverted to the extreme but who would deny the dirty old boy his right to his pleasures…and hey, if we can get off on it too then why not indeed?

Presentation of both features by Sub Rosa Blue is decent enough and what you should expect from shot on video productions with 'Helter Skelter' edging it with at least some level of nice production values. There's 'nout' in the way of bonus features but considering this a budget priced double bill disc there isn't really grounds for complaint.

The important fact for this package is the films themselves and with that in mind this is both a hit and miss package…with 'Broken Dolls' we see one of Franco's worst movies to date, with 'Helter Skelter' we get one of his finest productions of late. Ideally Sub Rosa Blue should perhaps have packaged 'Helter Skelter' as the main feature, thankfully this is billed as the first of a series and I for one am looking forward to more of this sort of quality Euro knee tremblers. Who ever said watching Franco was an easy ride?

Review by Alan Simpson